Being Basic 101

Basic girls, they’re everywhere.

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They’re next to you in lecture, yapping behind you in line at Starbucks, walking out of frat houses and acting #whitegirlwasted on any given Saturday night. You name it, a basic bitch is there.

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As much as the basic bitch annoys us, there’s a little bit of her inside of all of us (unfortunately!) Everything the basic bitch says makes your eyes twitch, your hands cringe and she can be spotted in Uggs, carrying a mocha frappuccino or dressed like a knock-off Kardashian who didn’t blend her bronzer or ace her contour. But as much as we want to hate her, cut her some slack because she’s only human…and we’ve ALL been there.

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So yeah, chances are you’ve behaved basic a few times. BUT, it’s okay! Why? Because part of being basic comes from our need and our want to fit in.

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Look, I’m the first to admit I’ve had my basic moments (FOR SURE!)

However, if you can recognize your basic moments and admit to your annoyingness, I can still chill with you. But if you’re soooooo basic you don’t even know what you’re doing wrong…oh honey, we have got a problem. 

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Don’t worry though, I am here to help. I’ve been basic at times, I’ve interacted with too many basic bitches to even count and I can hit you with some serious knowledge when it comes to you level of basic.

1 being the kind of girl who tells it like it is, follows her own path, doesn’t agitate the men in her life and NEVER instagrammed a pumpkin spice latte.

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10 being the girl who says ‘literally’ in every sentence, bugs out about even the most trivial things, considers Uggs a fashion statement and only goes out to take pictures of her and her #whitegirlwasted gang of basic bitches.

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TSwift^^^

ughhhhh….relax girl.

Anyways, here’s how you know that you ARE a diagnosed Basic Bitch.

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  1. You take down your Instagram because it doesn’t have enough likes.
  2. You “literally, can’t even” do anything. Like seriously, learn a new word lady.
  3. For someone as healthy and young as a basic bitch, you are always “dying.” “I’m so tired, I’m dying.” “Mike just opened my Snapchat, I’m dying!” 
  4. Taking selfies is a lifestyle for you. It’s something you do 24/7 and, unfortunately for us, there something you’re constantly posting EVERYWHERE.
  5. You put on makeup and got dressed just to have a photoshoot to find a new pro pic. My heart goes out to the friend who you forced to do that.
  6. Posting a photo on Instagram or Facebook takes hours. Picking a basic caption and filing through filters and edits is time consuming and exhausting. It’s like, “This filter is making me look weird. I can’t find a good one, I’m literally dying!” (double whammy right there!)
  7. You know all the local Starbucks locations and your favorite order better than you know the back of your hand.
  8. You’re attracted to frat boys and f**k boys. You know their bad news, but they’re like the boy version of basic bitches so it’s like Barbie and Ken, right? Perfect!
  9. You own Uggs, Ugg slippers, a hundred pairs of solid black leggings and, of course, infinity scarves and tons of chapstick.
  10. You have confidently asked the question, “I want to wear this, but is it slutty enough?” (huge no-no ladies!)

So sorry basics, but ya’ll just got served.

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So whether you basic level is 0, 10 or 5, don’t forget to laugh at yourself. We are all going to be basic at times, but remember to come back to reality shortly after.

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Keep doing you ladies, but remember this piece of advice from the infamous, notorious, obnoxiously rich, revered (maybe?) family….

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Love ya, KhloMoney.

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7 comments

  1. wintersjacqueline · February 14, 2016

    I think most girls at GW are guilty of many of these on the list of ten. I definitely relate to owning Uggs, a hundred pairs of black leggings, and infinity scarves; taking down an Instagram because it didn’t get enough likes; and not being able to find a flattering filter. You expose the silly and ridiculous things we all do and don’t want to admit. Thanks for this honest review.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Grace McGuire · February 16, 2016

    Haha this is great. There can’t be more than a few dozen people at GW who can say they scored less than a 3 or a 2. I wonder how soon the customs and habits will change.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Arianna F · February 16, 2016

    Hahaha I love this! As much as I love to hate on girls who are basic, I definitely have a lot of the basic girl in me. You definitely express all of the things that no one actually wants to admit, which is what makes this post so great. Also, your memes/gifs are on point!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. sarajenis · February 17, 2016

    Wow – you really got this one spot on. Especially at GW, there are so many basic bitches, and I’m not fully eliminating myself or my friends from that category. Laughed out loud and said “sooo true” countless times as I read through your list with one of my friends. Love the style of your writing and look forward to your posts each week. XO

    Liked by 1 person

  5. thomfusco · February 17, 2016

    I love this! While everyone (and I mean everyone) can admit to being a basic bitch at some point, I think this post is so spot on. I am definitely a victim to taking hours to figure out my instagram and facebook pictures after I put them through about seven different apps. You have such a punchy writing style too! Very well done.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Kyle Kerchaert · February 17, 2016

    This post is so important. I’m really glad you shared this perspective. Basic is a word all-too-often used to knock down girls, and for the most trivial reasons. Of course we’re going to like watching KUWTK and comfy LuLu Lemon leggings. This doesn’t make us lesser people. We definitely all need to learn to laugh at these guilty pleasures we share (and you’re gifs definitely helped add some humor to the subject).

    Liked by 1 person

  7. allyleesite · February 18, 2016

    This is hilarious and so true and the GIFs are all so on point. Basic bitches need to be called out and this post did just that. Also, I really like how your blog is set up it’s very professional and clean.

    Liked by 1 person

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